


Alke

by mallaidhsomo



Series: Oenomel [1]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Earthborn (Mass Effect), Geth (Mass Effect), M/M, Mass Effect 1, Renegade Shepard (Mass Effect), Ruthless (Mass Effect), The Butcher of Torfan, mShenko, terrible driving, the Mako
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:41:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28160325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mallaidhsomo/pseuds/mallaidhsomo
Summary: Alke- the Ancient Greek element for 'strength'The Butcher of Torfan.Frankly, Eric Shepard liked the nickname.Eric Shepard (Soldier/Earthborn/Ruthless) during the events of Mass Effect 1.
Relationships: Kaidan Alenko/Male Shepard
Series: Oenomel [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2018687
Comments: 56
Kudos: 36





	1. The Butcher of Torfan

**Author's Note:**

> Eric Shepard (Soldier/Earthborn/Ruthless) during the events of ME1. Eventual mshenko. Tags to be updated as I go. 
> 
> Thank you to my lovely friend [ potionsmaster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/potionsmaster) for her beta services! *mwah!!*

_The Butcher of Torfan_.

He heard the whispers as he came around the corner towards the mess hall. He wasn't surprised by them. In fact, it was expected. Torfan wasn’t a mess he wore with pride, but he wasn’t going to hide from it, either. It was what it was.

"That's what they call him," one voice whispered: male from the sounds of it.

Frankly, Eric Shepard liked the nickname. He could have done worse. The Butcher mantel didn't bother him so much. Not many people, alive anyway, knew what happened on Torfan. If the general public wanted to draw their own conclusions on the matter, and give him wicked nicknames in the process, that was fine by him. If those in his command listened to him and obeyed his orders, they could call him whatever they wanted behind his back.

"Got his entire unit killed. Sent them straight to their deaths..."

"Gods, I hope I'm never on his bad side…" a second voice, this one female.

"I can't believe the Captain would bring him on board. How long before he sends _us_ through a meat grinder just to do a job?" The first voice again.

"That's _enough._ " A third voice, also male. Deep and rich, with just a hint of _rasp_ to hit. Suddenly Eric was much more interested in this conversation.

Fuck _me_ , that's a voice to get a man in trouble.

"Sorry, sir, it's just that-" the female voice spoke again.

"Just what? Giving into the rumor mill already?" the phone sex operator voice again. "Knock it off, both of you."

"Yes, sir." The first voice replied, abashed. "Sorry, sir."

Smirking, Shepard picked this moment to finally round the corner, bringing himself into view of his three subordinates. Upon seeing him, all three scrambled from their chairs, metal screeching against metal, and stood straight, offering crisp salutes. Eric could have, probably should have told them to stand down, but he didn't. Instead, he walked past the trio, sizing them up as he made his way to the coffee pot. The woman and one of the men didn't make much of an impression. But the third man was where Eric's gaze lingered.

Tall, dark, and handsome. His fucking weakness.

As the three stood waiting for orders, he casually poured a cup of coffee, added copious cream and sugar, and took another peek of tall, dark, and handsome.

Eric had always been an ass man.

The coffee was perfect.

"Well," he mused. "At least someone on this ship knows how the _Butcher of Torfan_ likes his coffee."

"Um, thank you, sir," said the man with the greatest ass he'd ever seen, who consequently was also the one with that husky voice he'd heard. Which meant that _this_ was the head of his marine detail, Lieutenant Alenko.

"At ease."

The trio relaxed, the two chatterboxes releasing a relieved breath, even though they were red faced and couldn’t meet Shepard’s glare. Alenko, however, stood at parade rest with a serene look on his face, not a care in the world. 

Eric knew how to make people squirm under his gaze and knew how to use what he had to his advantage.

He walked past the group, towards the elevators, taking a moment to tip his mug at Alenko.

"Excellent coffee, Lieutenant." He regarded him with a smirk, and when Alenko’s brown gaze locked with his, he winked.

Alenko’s gaze tore away from Shepard’s, his Adam’s apple bobbing once, and Eric could have sworn he blushed.

Huh. Well wasn’t that interesting.

He left the three of them to their devices, belatedly remembering that he’d never caught the other two marines names.

~*~

Shepard sat in the shuttle bay as the Normandy made its approach to Eden Prime. Alenko and Jenkins sat against the opposite wall, kitted up and ready to go minus their helmets. One of Jenkins’ legs was bobbing relentlessly, armor plating clanking against the metal bench. Shepard gritted his teeth to stop himself from telling Jenkins to knock it the fuck off. The kid had been a bit…overzealous when he’d spoken to him earlier, eager to see ‘real action’.

Shepard knew from experience that it was a recipe for disaster, and if Jenkins didn’t get his head on straight… or better yet, hold the fuck still. Shepard opened his mouth to tell Jenkins off, but Alenko beat him to it, slapping a gauntleted hand on Jenkins’ thigh with enough force to get his attention. Jenkins met the Lieutenant’s eyes, and they exchanged a few muffled words before Jenkins nodded and sat back, still looking wound up, but at least he was sitting still.

Alenko gave him a reassuring pat on the knee, then joined Shepard on the opposite side of the shuttle. Eric eyed him curiously. There seemed to be no lingering embarrassment from their earlier conversation.

"Have you ever been to Eden Prime, sir?" Alenko mused.

"Nope." Shepard offered, non-committal. 

"They say it's our most beautiful colony."

Eric snorted. "All the colonies probably say that. Besides, hard to compare to the birthplace of humanity."

Alenko perked up at that. "Did you grow up on Earth, sir?"

Shepard nodded. 'Grew up' implied family, picket fences, and yards. For Eric, 'existed in' was more of an accurate statement, though he wasn't about to admit that to Alenko. "Something like that."

"Vancouver, myself." Alekno offered. "Well, we moved around a bit when I was a kid while my Dad was still in, but when he retired, we settled there. Close to family. What about you, sir?"

Shepard studied him. Were they really sitting here, having small talk about where they grew up? Was Eric supposed to _care_ about Alenko's WASP upbringing? Shepard was fairly sure the man would faint if Eric started in on stories of how he 'grew up'.

Eric wasn't one to offer information freely. Especially not about himself. Still, what was the harm in the name of a city?

"Budapest."

"Oh, wow. Beautiful city. I visited as a kid."

Shepard scoffed. "If you 'grew up' where I did you wouldn't be saying that Lieutenant."

Alenko flushed in embarrassment, and god damn if pink in the cheeks wasn't a good color on him. "Sorry, sir. I didn't mean-"

"It's fine," Eric interrupted, a little harsher than he intended, but still, this wasn't show and fucking tell.

The Normandy touched down at their landing zone, and Shepard fit his helmet over his head, relieved. Idle conversation was out of his wheelhouse. The feel of his rifle in his hand and the tickling anticipation in his nerves…that part he understood.

~*~

Shepard glared into his second cup of coffee, which had not helped with the chill that had seemed to seep into his bones ever since he'd shoved Alenko out of the way of that god damn beacon. A beacon that was now sitting in a thousand tiny pieces on the surface of Eden Prime, according to Anderson. A beacon that had brain probed him and left him with a vision that put any bad trip to shame.

Nihlus was dead. Jenkins was dead. There was a rouge Spectre running around in a ship that resembled something Eric had stolen off a food cart once, and the Normandy was in route to the Citadel, where Shepard was supposed to convince the council that everything that had happened on Eden Prime wasn't just him losing his god damned mind.

It would be a miracle if they got off the Citadel without him telling the council to go fuck themselves.

He scowled at the sound of footsteps approaching, followed by someone sliding into the bench in front of him.

Alenko, of course. Shepard had managed to scare off anyone else who dared approach him for the last thirty or so minutes, effectively making the mess his own private space. But Alenko was either the smartest person on the ship, or the dumbest. Shepard still hadn't figured that out yet.

Alenko palmed a cup of coffee that was almost white from all the cream and sugar he'd added to it. Shepard frowned at the dark brown liquid in his own mug. He'd been in such a hurry to hold something warm that he hadn't bothered to make the coffee palatable.

As if it were true that biotics could read minds, Alenko slid a caddy with creamer and sugar across the table towards them. Shepard grunted his thanks, snagging four sugar packs and filling the mug to the brim with creamer.

"I wanted to check in on you," Alenko offered. "You scared the shit out of Williams and I down there."

Shepard took a sip of his coffee, studying him. A retort was on the tip of his tongue; was his marine lieutenant a doctor now, too? But in all fairness, Alenko looked as shitty as Shepard felt, dark circles under eyes, skin a shade too pale.

"I feel like shit warmed over," Shepard decided on brutal honesty, one of his other favorite responses. "But I'll live."

Alenko hummed, gaze dropping to his coffee for a moment before he took a sip. "Yeah, me too. I feel a migraine coming on. Dr. Chakwas gave me something to try to head it off, but with the L2, you just never know," He made a vague gesture towards the base of his skull.

Shepard regarded him curiously. He knew fuck all about biotic implants, save that they existed. He had a biotic in ICT with him when he earned his N1. Well, Shepard earned it. The biotic didn't last a week.

"Your implant?"

Alenko nodded once. "Definitely a piece of wetware they regretted in the end. I'm lucky, though. Most people in my shoes are either dead or wish they were dead by thirty-five." He snorted wryly. "The occasional debilitating migraine is the only thing it gifted me." 

Shepard raised an eyebrow at him. "That's lucky to you."

Alenko snorted, running a finger around the rim of his coffee mug. "I mean, compared to being a vegetable or hooked on Red Sand, yeah, I consider it lucky." 

Shepard regarded him curiously. That was one way to look at it.

"Faulty wetware or not, you saved my ass down there," he offered. "I didn't even know you were biotic until you tossed that geth off the train."

One half of Alenko’s mouth curled into a smile, and Shepard could have sworn he saw a small flush in his cheeks.

"And," Shepard continued, tipping his coffee mug at Alenko. "You know how I take my coffee. Is it true what they say about biotics? Are you reading my mind, Lieutenant?"

Alenko huffed, and yeah, that was definitely a blush in his face, which Shepard found highly fascinating. He couldn’t help but smirk, and Alenko squirmed in his seat a little.

 _Really_ fascinating.

"No, biotics can't read minds." Alenko chastised, but one side of his mouth had pulled up into a grin. "If I could, I'd be living off my lottery winning in Fiji, not nearly killing my commanding officer by almost activating an ancient alien beacon."

Alenko's gaze fell back to his coffee, blush deepening, but the smile disappeared as well.

Shepard frowned. They had covered this already. "Alenko," he said, waiting until the other man met his gaze. "It was a little reckless, maybe, but I'm pretty sure you only beat Williams to it because she was flinging husk guts out of her hair." Alenko snorted at that, appearing to relax slightly. "Curiosity gets the best of us, sometimes." He leaned forward, canting his head to the side and smirking. "Did you lick the flagpole in winter as a kid, too?"

Alenko sputtered, face now bright red. Shepard laughed, feeling a hundred times better. He stood up to deposit his now empty coffee mug in the sink, smacking Alenko good naturedly on the shoulder as he passed.

"Get some sleep, Lieutenant," he said, leaving his flustered crewmate to his own devices and heading to the crew quarters for some rack time. "Big day tomorrow. I have to convince the council I'm not bat shit crazy. You're not going to want to miss it."


	2. Therum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Milky Way bonds over shenanigans. 
> 
> _They had already gone over this in Flux when she had first approached him, offering to buy a drink for the 'First Human Spectre'. He invited her back to his cabin with the clear understanding that this relationship had an expiration date of several hours. Get in, scratch the itch, get out. No post-coital cuddling, no staying the night, and no exchanging of information._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my good friend [ potionsmaster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/potionsmaster) for her beta skills!!

"Look me up, next time you're on the Citadel," the blonde said, snatching Shepard's wrist to input her contact information into his omni-tool. She winked at him, offering a smile, and Eric knew she was probably going for a sultry look, but all he could focus on was that her eyeliner had smudged over the last few hours. He caught a whiff of her expensive floral perfume, that was cloying now that it had mixed with sweat. He wrinkled his nose, taking a breath from his lips.

They had already gone over this in Flux when she had first approached him, offering to buy a drink for the 'First Human Spectre'. He invited her back to his cabin with the clear understanding that this relationship had an expiration date of several hours. Get in, scratch the itch, get out. No post-coital cuddling, no staying the night, and no exchanging of information.

Which was why Shepard found himself standing outside the Normandy's airlock, waiting for the skycar he had called for her. He frowned as she closed the interface on his omni-tool, letting her fingertips linger on the inside of his wrist. He pulled away, absentmindedly rubbing his wrist against his pants.

"You know that's not going to happen," he said, nodding towards the descending skycar.

She shrugged, opening the door to the skycar and slipping inside. "Can't blame a girl for trying," She winked. "If you change your mind…"

He shut the door of the skycar and waggled his fingers at her as she blinked at him from the other side of the glass. Smirking, he smacked the side of the cab and turned back towards the airlock before it even left the ground.

The Normandy, which had been a hive of activity just hours before, was eerily quiet. The automated updates and refueling meant that only a skeleton crew remained, most of them on the Citadel enjoying an evening of R&R, so Shepard didn't see a single person until he descended to the crew deck.

"And this is my sisters and I," a female voice drifted from the direction of the mess.

" _Four_ of you?" came the deep rumble of surprise.

A scoff. "Why? How many siblings do you have?"

"None. I guess my parents figured there was no point in trying again when they perfected it the first time."

Shepard rounded the corner in time to see Williams give Alenko a playful slap on the shoulder.

"Ass," she chided, grinning. The answering 'ow' was half-hearted.

Shepard meant to walk right past them to the showers, but Williams' teasing smirk caught his attention.

"Commander," she greeted. "Your guest _get off_ ok?"

Shepard hummed. She meant the double entendre, he could tell by her shit eating grin, and if she thought he'd ignore it, she had another thing coming.

"Yes," he replied, grinning sardonically. "On all accounts."

Williams sniggered. "So, when's the wedding?"

Shepard rolled his eyes, slipping into the seat next to Alenko. "You're hilarious, Williams."

He pulled up the interface on his omni-tool. The address book popped up, starting with the 'A's'. He frowned. "How do you delete something off here?"

Alenko leaned it a little closer, peeking at the screen. The scent of cedar and musk rolled off him, along with the faint scent of ozone, light but masculine. Eric inhaled through his nose. It was much less offensive than the scent what’s-her-face wore. Actually, it was downright pleasing, now that he got a better whiff.

"Just find the name you want to delete," he was saying, pointing at the interface. At Shepard's wry look, he blinked big brown eyes.

Williams cackled. "You don't remember her name, do you?"

Eric huffed.

"Here," Alenko said, closing a hand around Shepard's wrist to pull his omni-tool closer. His fingertips were a light touch against the inside of Eric's wrist, but warm. He poked the interface a few times, bottom lip pulled between his teeth as he concentrated.

"Done," a couple more taps and the interface closed. "I just deleted the last entry."

Shepard hummed in appreciation; he hadn’t been paying attention to what Alenko did because he was still basking in the pleasant scent. "What are you two doing down here, anyway? I figured you'd be enjoying your night off."

Alenko shrugged. "Crowds really aren't my thing. It can trigger a migraine too easily."

Williams grinned, leaning forward on the table on her elbows. "We were just trading stories about growing up." She playfully elbowed Alenko in the arm. "Did you know LT here grew up on a _farm_?"

Alenko huffed. "It was an _orchard_ , not a farm, and I didn't grow up there. It's just in my family."

Williams' grin turned sardonic. "Uh huh. Did your parents buy you a pony growing up, too?"

The tops of Alenko's cheeks turned pink. Williams' bark of laughter could probably be heard back in the Sol system.

"Oh my _god_ , they did!"

Alenko's cheeks burned even brighter, bringing a small smirk to Eric's face.

Shepard slipped from the bench, grabbed a bottle of water from the cooler. "Thanks for the tech assist, Lieutenant." He patted him good-naturedly on the shoulder as he passed. "We hit the relay for the Knossos system at 0700. I expect you two to be ready to go. You're hitting planet-side with me."

"Oh, I'll sleep like a rock now, Commander," Williams quipped. "Especially now that your very…enthusiastic guest is gone."

Shepard threw her the middle finger over his shoulder. Her responding laugh followed him until his cabin door slid closed behind him.

~*~

Turns out, the activity 'off the goddamn charts' on Therum was geth, and lots of them. That was annoying to Shepard, as was the shitty climate. Not much of a view either: rocks, lava, more rocks and lava. The only bright part was the exasperated and sometimes anxious looks he received from Alenko and Williams (mostly Alenko) as Shepard steered the Mako across the terrain.

The rover drove like a shopping trolley with three bad wheels, and Shepard cursed up a storm as he overcompensated a turn and skid out, causing Alenko to slide across the seat, bumping into Eric's armored thigh with a clink. He shot Shepard a wry look as he righted himself, and Shepard grinned in amusement when he heard his very buttoned up lieutenant curse under his breath.

The shock from the turret firing vibrated through the Mako. Unfortunately, all Williams managed to hit was the side of the hill, cascading rocks onto the ground that Shepard had to swerve to avoid.

"Holy _fuck,_ Williams, I've seen a drunk volus with better aim than you!" Eric snapped as Alenko huffed, grabbing onto the passenger door for purchase before he slid into Shepard again. 

"With all due respect, _sir,"_ Williams replied petulantly from her spot in the turret, righting her aim enough to take down a geth trooper. "We're in more danger of dying by your terrible driving than the geth."

"Maybe Williams should drive," Alenko offered from his white-knuckled position. He had been doing a fine, albeit easy job of navigating and keeping an eye out for hostiles, and Eric glared at him; that job description didn't include trying to insinuate something in his typical polite way. At least Williams was upfront about it.

He cleared his throat at Shepard's look. "I mean, you're a better shot than she is." Williams scoffed from behind him, but was smart enough not to continue.

"Duly noted, Lieutenant." Shepard replied dryly, and Alenko pursed his lips but stayed quiet, turning back to the combat scanner.

Alenko tapped at the combat scanner, studying it. "There's something big around this corner." He pointed to the east. "About twenty meters."

"What kind of ‘big’?" Shepard piped up but rounded the bend anyway.

The 'something big' stood on four synthetic legs, vaguely crablike in appearance. It stood to attention, coming out of a huddle, a blue light on its geth-like face focusing on the Mako. It stood at the top of an outcropping, overlooking one of Therum's many lovely lava lakes.

"Shit!" Williams spat, and immediately began firing, rounds pinging off the geth's shields.

A round from one of the geth's main guns hit the Mako's shields, causing the hairs on Shepard's arms to stand on end as static electricity flowed through the cabin. Next to him, Alenko flinched. From what Shepard had learned about biotics over the last couple of days, he didn't imagine that felt good on an implant.

"Shields holding at eighty-five percent," Alenko put in. "We shouldn't stay in this thing's direct range of fire, commander."

Eric hummed, zigzagging to the left to avoid another shot from the geth's cannon and listening to Alenko cursing softly next to him. The turret thundered above them as Williams fired off an RPG. The geth shuddered, shield's flickering, and Williams switched back to smaller arms to lay into it before it recovered.

Shepard grinned, feeling the familiar, cooling in his veins that came with a good fight, the sharp focus, blood pounding in his ears. He thought he heard Alenko call his rank from next to him, voice pitched slightly higher than usual, but he ignored it.

The Mako sped up towards the geth, another pulse bouncing off the shields.

"Shields at seventy percent," Alenko announced, and Shepard could have sworn he sounded nervous.

They closed in, the geth only a few meters away as Williams' rounds pickied away at its shield, just not as fast as it was picking apart theirs. Alenko announced the shields down to fifty-five percent a second before Williams declared, 'oh fuck _me_ ', either faster on the uptake than the lieutenant or more willing to vocalize.

The last blast from the geth's turret momentarily blinded Shepard, filling his vision with a bright white flash. He slammed the brakes a moment after he heard, and felt, the crunch of metal on metal. He blinked away the stars in his eyes, realizing through the buzzing in his ears that Williams had stopped firing. In fact, she was laughing, almost manically.

The geth toppled down the ravine, sparks flying as it rolled into the molten lake below.

Shepard grinned widely at Alenko as his lieutenant just gaped at him, brown eyes wide and lips slightly parted. Behind them, Williams was still cackling.

"What?" Shepard offered. "You did say I was a better shot."

~*~

The geth that Shepard dumped into the lava lake, as it turns out, was not the largest geth on Therum.

_Bet Alenko is wishing for a Mako shaped bullet right about now,_ Shepard thought bitterly as he fell behind a storage container, sucking wheezing breaths into his lungs. White hot pain burned across the new hole in his side, courtesy of the even larger crab-like geth whose gun ripped right through his shields, missing his armor entirely and hitting the soft spot above his hip.

Of course, if it wasn't for the brand-new shield capacitors in his hard suit, the shot would have likely cut him right in half.

Alenko was on his knees next to Shepard a moment later, the deep thrumming of his biotics making Eric's teeth rattle as his lieutenant threw a barrier around both of them. The gentle ripple of his biotic field distorted everything outside of it, like viewing the world through a fishbowl. The blue glow of his biotics gave Alenko an almost ethereal glow, specifically evident in his eyes as he calmly pulled up his HUD to access Shepard’s biofeed.

Williams cursed, laying down cover fire from her safer position without being told. Shepard felt a short, sharp pain against his side as Alenko activated the mexo in his hard suit, then the cooling wetness of medi-gel being applied to his side. Alenko’s touch was warm, the haptic sensors in his suit giving the illusion of touch. It was a gentle touch, too, for a marine, anyway. At least, if memory served, Alenko was far gentler than the medic on Torfan who had manhandled nearly another quart of blood out of Shepard in his attempt to stabilize him.

Rounds pinged off the metal of the storage container, and Eric checked his combat scanner, the two blips indicating two smaller geth that Williams was currently too preoccupied to take care of. Shepard's assault rifle was a calming weight in his hand as he raised it. Alenko's barrier pulsed as the geth rounded the corner within their line of sight, erupting in a brilliant flash of blue light. The smaller of the geth fell to a useless heap, fried from the biotic blast. The larger of the two fell moments later, brought down by the disrupter rounds Shepard was able to fire off while it stumbled.

Alenko's eyes were still glowing blue when Shepard glanced back to him, but fading fast to their normal brown. He normally smelled faintly of ozone, but the crisp, clean scent was at the forefront now, almost calming.

"You ok, sir?" Alenko touched Shepard’s arm, a reassuring gesture, and it sent tiny electric sparks along Shepard’s skin, standing the hairs on end.

Shepard nodded, rolling up to his feet and replacing the heat sink in his rifle. Alenko retreated to the other end of the container, a better vantage point to assist Williams with taking down the final geth. Eric winked at him as he passed, grinning impishly.

"Bet you wish we had a Mako to run it over with _now_ , huh, LT?"

~*~

The flesh under the bandage on Shepard's side itched, the omni-gel doing its work to ensure a quick, scar-free recovery. It was distracting him from the conversation at hand, namely the one with the asari that was now residing in the lab behind the med-bay.

Liara had proved herself to be more than an academic, holding her own against a handful of geth and a pissed off krogan, and Shepard decided it was in his best interest to keep her close, especially considering her Prothean knowledge and her relation to Saren's second in command.

After the typical round of questioning, in which Liara insisted that she had not spoken to her mother in years and was heartbroken to learn of her betrayal, Shepard left his new crewmate to rest, exiting the lab to find Alenko sitting on one of the examination tables, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Alenko," Eric said by way of greeting, and his lieutenant looked up a little sluggishly, brown eyes slightly hazed over. "Everything ok?"

Alenko nodded, which was apparently a mistake as he winced immediately afterwards.

"I'm good commander," he replied, his already deep voice pitched a little lower. "Just overdid it a bit with that barrier down there." He nodded to Dr. Chakwas, who was approaching him carrying a small injector. "Doc'll give me the good stuff and I'll sleep it off. Be good to go tomorrow."

Dr. Chakwas offered him a slight smile, gently taking his arm to inject the medication into his veins. The injector made a small hissing sound as it pieced his flesh, and after a couple of moments Alenko let out a soft sigh. Apparently, that really _was_ the good stuff.

"Good job down there, Lieutenant." Eric offered, nodding at Dr. Chakwas as she went back to her desk.

Alenko hummed, rolling his sleeve back down a muscular forearm. "Got a little intense." He blinked heavily, the medication evidently already doing their job.

Eric absentmindedly wondered if Alenko was a chatty drunk or a sleepy drunk. "I imagine intense is going to be par for the course for the rest of this mission."

Alenko snorted. He opened his mouth to reply, but a yawn slipped out instead. Eric smirked, putting a gentle hand on Alenko's shoulder to push him down to the bed.

"Get some sleep, Alenko. I need you at your best so you can pull my ass out of the fire again."

Alenko huffed, pulling the covers up to his chin. His eyes were already drifting shut, and his voice was low and drowsy when he spoke.

"Shepard, I have a feeling you're going to give me grey hairs before I'm thirty-five."

Dr. Chakwas gave a small snort of laughter from her desk, and Shepard threw her a wry look before turning back to Alenko, who was almost off to dream land.

"Don't worry, LT," he offered, giving him a playful pat on the shoulder as he turned to leave. "I think you'd be able to pull off a little salt and pepper."

The only answer he received was a soft snore. 


	3. Luna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is back on his home turf, and he's none too happy about it.
> 
> _Shepard could think of worse fates than fielding questions from a crewmate's parent, most of them involving batarians._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to my good friend [ potionsmaster ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/potionsmaster) for being the bestest of betas and listening to me drone on and on about Eric.

The crew was positively giddy about landing on Earth before the next mission, even the aliens. Shepard leaned against the window near the cockpit, arms crossed over his chest, watching the familiar blue orb grow bigger as they approached. 

Twenty-four hours near Alliance Headquarters in Vancouver. Enough time for a briefing on the sensitive mission that brought them all the way back to the Sol system in the first place, and an over-night pass for the crew. Shepard debated sleeping on the ship that night, but the lure of a comfortable hotel bed, a mini-bar, and company for the night overruled any lingering thoughts of how uncomfortable being back on Earth made him, and he booked a decent hotel room before they even hit atmo. 

Joker mentioned he hadn't been to Earth since flight school, and while he was never very keen on planets in general, _'_ gravity isn't a friend to my bones _'_ he had said. He was looking forward to setting down on a planet where 'not _everything_ wants to kill us'. 

Williams packed enough in her ruck sack for a week, prattling on about shopping for souvenirs for her sisters and 'actual fucking food'. 

Garrus expressed concerns about a non-amphibious species living on a planet with 'so much water'. 

"You going to start checking us for gills now?" Shepard quipped, following the crowd towards the shuttle bay. 

Garrus' mandibles twitched as he made a low humming noise. "I'm just concerned, is all. Why would anyone want to live on a planet where they could drown at nearly any moment?" 

Williams snorted, hefting her bag onto her shoulder. "You want us to take you surfing, Garrus?" 

"I don't know what that is, but I don't think I'd be good at it, Ash." 

"It's _beautiful_ ," Tali beamed. "So much life. So many different climates." 

Eric didn't bother mentioning the seedier side of planet life. From where they stood, the Vancouver skyline beckoning them from outside the glass, life on Earth seemed picturesque. Eric knew better; knew that walking two blocks in the wrong direction would land them in places that resembled where _he_ spent his youth, and not the picture-perfect upbringing that he imagined Alenko had. 

" _Je te verrai bientôt, maman. Je t'aime.[1]_ " Alenko said into his comm. He hung up and settled back into his seat next to Liara, catching Shepard's eye. "A few of us are meeting my mom for lunch in a couple of hours, Commander." He shifted slightly in his seat. "Would you, um… would like to join us?" 

Shepard could think of worse fates than fielding questions from a crewmate's parent, most of them involving batarians. 

"No, Alenko. I have things to take care of." Which was only a half-lie. The briefing would probably take an hour or so, but after that, his day was free. Free to find a bar and someone to spend the night with. 

Alenko's brows pinched together slightly, a look resembling hurt crossing his face for a moment, before Williams pulled him into a conversation about his parents. 

Shepard left the shuttle, Pressly stoically following behind him, heading towards headquarters for his briefing, the happy chatter of his crew in his wake. 

~*~ 

The hotel Eric booked for the night wasn't nice enough to have a bar inside, but it was nice enough to have a decent bar right next door. The booze was passable, nothing too fancy but not the bottom of the shelf. Anything too expensive made his skin itch, but he had come too far from living on the streets to not allow himself a little bit of luxury. 

He sipped his drink, some semi-sweet concoction the bartender had whipped up for him, studying the data-pad with the mission report. Highly classified was a no-brainer, but the implications could negatively affect the Alliance if it got out, losing control of a VI at a training facility nearly within spitting distance of Earth to the tune of nearly twenty deaths. 

Shepard frowned at the data-pad. Sending the 'First Human Spectre' to successfully eliminate the threat would show that the Alliance was correct to pick Shepard as their poster boy. On the other hand, if things went south on this mission, they could always chalk it up to mistakenly trusting The Butcher of Torfan with such a sensitive situation. 

As usual, failure wasn't an option. He was being given the freedom to solve the problem as he saw fit, and the burden of bearing whatever the consequences may be. 

Someone slid into the seat next to him, and Shepard turned to meet the eyes of a pretty, violet skinned asari. She smirked, her eyes appraising him from head to toe. 

"You look like you could use some company," she offered, finger circling the rim of her glass. 

Eric grinned, head cocked slightly as he gave her the same appreciative once-over. His night was looking up. 

She reached out with her free hand to trance fingertips against his wrist. Her skin was slightly cold and clammy, and she smelled like she got carried away with the expensive Earth perfume. It wasn’t unpleasant; that would come later when she was leaving his room and offering a touch as a goodbye, but it didn’t make him want to take an extra whiff, either. 

But she was attractive, she was willing, and he’d always had a thing for asari. Embrace eternity, indeed. 

"I really could, as a matter of fact." 

~*~ 

Shepard found Alenko outside the last bunker after weapons checks, sitting against the wall with his arms propped up on his knees. Tali was still inside the bunker, scanning what was left of the drones and VI tech. The night side of Earth was directly above them, and Alenko's head was tipped back, gazing. 

"Before today, when was the last time you were home?" he asked. 

Shepard snorted, stealing a glance up. It was the middle of the night over Europe, and he tore his eyes away before they focused on the eastern side. Home. That was a good one. 

"Last time I was at the Villa." 

"Really?" he sounded surprised, and Shepard rolled his eyes, not that Alenko could see that. 

"I don't have two loving parents waiting at the docks for me, Alenko. Or any family, for that matter." He leaned against the wall of the bunker, sliding down to sit next to Alenko. "That isn't 'home'." He waved vaguely in the direction of Earth. 

Alenko stared at him, and it was disconcerting to not be able to see the expression under his helmet, but Shepard attuned frustration from the way he shifted uncomfortably and flexed the fingers of his gauntleted hands. 

"I was pretty privileged, I realize that. And maybe if I hadn't manifested as biotic you could get away with calling me a spoiled rich kid." He sighed. "But my parents didn't fight it when Conatix dragged me off to Jump Zero and, well... you know how _that_ turned out." 

Shepard hummed. _That_ had been an enlightening conversation, to say the least. Alenko was nothing if not full of surprises, and their talk about BAaT had made a lot of things clear. Shepard didn't want to be on the receiving end of Alenko's biotics if he lost control, but damned if he wasn't curious to see that aimed at an enemy. So far, the lieutenant’s abilities in the field had been impressive but drawn back. Shepard got the impression he was capable of a lot more than he let on. 

"For what it's worth," Shepard told him. "That girl was an idiot. What's-her-name." 

Alenko huffed. "Really." 

Shepard hummed, nodding. "If my partner, or whatever, killed for me, in self-defense, the last thing I'd do is ghost them. Actually, I'd probably drop to my knees then and there." 

Alenko's chuckle broke off on a cough, and Shepard imagined he was red-faced under his helmet. "Um, thanks? I think." 

Shepard shrugged. "You're badass, Alenko. And also the most nauseatingly good person I've ever met. That's a good combination, especially considering how you know I can be." 

"You don't dole out compliments very often, do you, Commander?" 

Shepard snorted, rolling to his feet as the Normandy descended to pick them up. "Consider it my gift to you." 

"You should know," Alenko said, standing up and wiping moon dust off his backside. "My mother insists you come to lunch with us next time we dock at HQ." 

Shepard scoffed. "I don't do very well with 'meet the parents', Alenko." 

He said it to see the other man squirm, and wasn't disappointed. "That's not…I mean,-" 

"Besides," Shepard interjected, saving Alenko from babbling himself any deeper into a hole. "That assumes we're ever actually pulled back to Earth during this mission." 

Alenko shrugged, humming his disagreement. "You haven't met my mom. She firmly believes she can _will_ the universe to work the way she wants it to." 

The gangplank of the Normandy lowered, and behind them, the bunker door slid shut as Tali exited, carrying an armload of drone parts. Shepard knew there was probably a regulation against that, somewhere, but he honestly didn't give a damn. He grinned at Alenko as they hiked up the ramp. 

"She sounds like my kind of lady." 

~*~ 

Shepard had been surprised to find _Pálinka_ in Vancouver, and even more surprised to find a variety of flavors. The three bottles he'd settled on sat on the mess hall table, and he dug through the cabinets for a glass to take back to his quarters. 

"That's, uh, a lot of drinking to do alone, Commander." 

Shepard snorted, digging two glasses out of the cabinet instead of one. He slid one of them across the table. Alenko caught it, one eyebrow raised higher than the other. 

"Guess you'll have to save me from myself, then." 

Alenko seemed to contemplate that as Shepard slid onto the bench across from him, eyes darting from the glass in his hand to the bottles on the table and finally to Shepard's face. He finally cleared his throat before taking a seat. He curled his fingers around the neck of one of the bottles, studying it. 

"I've never heard of this before." 

Shepard hummed, reaching automatically for the bottle of plum. "It's _Pálinka_ ," he explained, pouring it into his glass. "It's a traditional Hungarian liquor. Comes in a fuck-ton of flavors. It's been a while since I've been able to find it, so I stocked up." 

Alenko watched him for a moment more, bottom lip pulled between his teeth. Then he nodded, studying the bottles for a moment more before settling on the cherry. He poured some into his glass, swirled it around a bit, then gave it a sniff. Shepard chuckled. 

"It won't bite, Alenko." 

He frowned at Shepard before raising the glass to his lips and taking a sip. He set his glass back on the table, not taking his hand off it. Shepard grinned. 

"That, uh… has a bigger kick than I expected." He coughed. 

"It's unassuming," Shepard explained, watching him take another sip, gaze drifting down to watching his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed. 

Alenko's face scrunched up, wrinkles popping up between his eyebrows and at the corners of his eyes. It was a more adorable look than it had any right to be, and Shepard wondered for a moment if it was possible to kiss that look right off his face. 

"I like it," Alenko explained, taking another sip with less theatrics this time. "Just took me by surprise. Most fruity drinks don't kick this much." 

Shepard hummed, hiding a grin behind his glass. Alenko opened his mouth to speak, caught Shepard's eye, and shut it. His face flushed slightly and he took another drink to hide it. 

"Go ahead and say whatever it is you're thinking, Alenko. Permission to speak freely." 

Alenko stared at him for a moment more, fiddling with his glass. "I'm just surprised, is all. By your choice in liquor." 

Shepard raised an eyebrow. "Why is that?" 

Alenko shrugged, studying the bottles of _Pálinka_ as he chose his words. "You never have anything good to say about Earth. You don't consider it home and you've been vocal about a pretty bleak upbringing. And yet you purposely bring not only _Earth_ liquor back to the ship, but one specific to your home country." 

Shepard snorted into his glass. "You a shrink now, too, Alenko?" 

He hummed, grinning. "Doesn't take a shrink to read into that, Commander." 

Shepard snorted, standing up and gathering the three bottles of _Pálinka ._ "A couple more glasses of this and I'd lay on the couch and tell you all my problems. But that isn't a rabbit hole we're going down tonight." 

Alenko grinned as Shepard passed by him on the way to his quarters. "Another time, then?" 

Shepard didn't say yes, but he didn't say no, either. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1] I'll see you soon, Mom. Love you.


	4. Feros

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Thorian is nasty, and Eric doesn't do so well under anesthesia.

Shepard was on Feros for all of five minutes before he wanted to leave. He and the crew were barely off the ship, speaking to a colonist that had been waiting for them when the geth problem presented itself in a hail of bullets.

The colonist dropped and Shepard and his squad dashed for cover, Wrex chuckling and making a quip about the colony 'not lying about their geth problem, I guess’. This was typical, Shepard decided. It would have been too easy for them to be able to have a normal conversation and get all the facts before being shot at.

Pressly's voice crackled nervously over the comm. "Commander, is everything ok out there?"

"We found the geth," Shepard replied dryly, frowning as a round pinged off his shields. "Keep the Normandy on lockdown. I'll contact you when we clean this up. I want the rest of our ground team ready to go. "

"Aye, aye, sir," Pressly replied immediately, and disconnected the call. Quick and to the point. That was why Shepard liked Pressly.

Shepard, Wrex, and Garrus cleared out the rest of the geth blocking entrance to the colony before heading inside. The rest of the ground team joined them when it was clear, Williams giving one of the downed geth a kick for good measure.

The inner portion of the colony was an even bigger cluster. Shepard had barely gotten the word 'Saren' out of his mouth before Fai Dan dropped a steaming pile of shit in his lap.

"What the fuck is this?" he groused, staring at the data-pad that Fai Dan had given him. Water, food, power… was this a colony of babies? How the hell were so many simple things going wrong?

Williams came to stand by his side, peeking at the data-pad. "This is a colony of scientists, Skipper. They may be equipped to handle issues like this on their own, but with so many geth running around…"

"Your point?" Shepard persisted. "We're here to investigate _Saren_ , not waste our time playing house,"

Something close to anger flashed across Williams' face before Alenko put a hand on her arm. He nodded at her, and she huffed, tearing her gaze away from Shepard and taking a step back.

"Commander, we have more than enough man-power to take care of the colony _and_ the geth," Alenko offered calmly. "We could easily split the team. Send half with you to take care of the geth and send another squad to take care of the items on this list."

Shepard regarded his earnest expression for a moment, lips pursed together. It seemed like a waste of resources, but the rest of the ground crew would be confined to the colony and the ship, anyhow, hanging around with their thumbs up their asses.

"Fine," he bit out. "Williams, you're with Garrus and I. Alenko, you can have the leftovers for your Good Samaritan mission."

Alenko blinked, a soft smile crossing his face. Williams snorted, rolling her eyes and turning away. Shepard handed the data-pad over to Alenko with minimal grumbling, then went to gather up Williams and Garrus.

~*~

There was a giant killer plant living under Zhu's Hope. A giant killer planet with _mind control_ powers, which was even better. Shepard sighed, racking his shotgun back onto the biometric lock on the back of his hard suit. He, Williams, and Garrus had managed to get back to the colony with only a couple of casualties. Shepard hadn't been convinced that nerve gas was going to work, standing by with his weapon ready as Williams launched a gas grenade at the mind scrambled colonists. He mentally prepared himself for a load of dead colonists, the Butcher of Torfan strikes again, because the whole thing seemed _too simple._

But it had worked, the gassed colonists dropping like rocks, and they returned to the colony to find the rest of the crew had barricaded themselves back inside the Normandy once the colonists had started going apeshit. Alenko and his squad had made it back shortly before, joining the rest of the crew on the ship when the shit hit the fan. Shepard didn’t want to imagine the paperwork if he had managed to save a bunch of colonists on his way back from ExoGeni only to find the entire colony wiped out when he got back.

Shepard glared at the passage that had been blocked by a shipping container up until a moment ago. He took stock of the state of his crew, deciding that if there were more of the fast-moving creepers guarding the Thorian, what he needed was a butt-load of biotics to keep the fuckers at bay before they got flanked. Thankfully, Liara and Alenko seemed no worse for wear after completing the colony's honey-do list and the ambush that followed.

He found Alenko in the medical clinic with Dr. Chakwas, tending to the injured colonists and handing out supplies.

"You're with me, Lieutenant,"

Alenko looked at him curiously, handing the med-kit he was holding over to one of the colony nurses. 

"Where's Dr. T'Soni?" Shepard inquired.

"She's looking through ExoGeni's research on the Thorian and the Protheans." Alenko replied.

Shepard snorted. "Of course she is. Go find her. We've got a plant monster to kill."

Still, the idea of a 'giant killer planet with mind control powers' didn't quite prepare him for what they found underneath Zhu's Hope. He _smelled_ the thing before they ever saw it; like rot and ruin, making any of the backstreet slums in Budapest smell like a rose garden in comparison.

_"Goddess,"_ Liara exclaimed, covering her mouth with a slender hand. Next to her, Alenko made a face, cursing under his breath.

The Thorian itself was around the corner, an oozing, disgusting, putrid mess that apparently produced asari clones. Awesome. And as he suspected, there were more of the spewing creepers guarding its lair, as well, a lair that was confined and labyrinthine. It was only a matter of time before something went wrong.

He shot his lieutenant a smirk. “You ever seen Little Shop of Horrors, Alenko?”

Alenko blinked at him; his expression screaming ‘now? Really?’. Liara just looked bemused.

Each tentacle-like node was surrounded by a hive of humanoid monsters, and each time Shepard blasted one of the nodes back to whatever hell it came from, the Thorian would barf out another asari clone. It was a slog, but they managed to make it to the top level without too much incident, Liara and Alenko’s biotics coming in as handy as Shepard had hoped they would. 

The biggest cluster of creepers yet huddled around the final node. Liara's singularity was invaluable for disabling them while Shepard and Alenko picked them off, but she wandered too close to the edge of the catwalk and didn't notice the creepers that began climbing up the side.

Alenko shoved her out of the way in an empty corridor, glowing blue from his barrier, but that caused her to drop her singularity and the creepers that were held inside. She called out to him as she rolled to her feet, firing into the grotesque forms that were surrounding him on all sides.

The blue light surrounding him pulsed and erupted in a brilliant flash as his barrier blew along with his shields. The field obliterated some of the creepers, and knocked a few more back over the precipice, but Alenko stumbled, his amp fried. He sunk to his knees, shaking and panting, and Shepard cursed, rushing towards him.

"Keep those things off us!" he hollered at Liara, nodding sharply to the creepers encroaching towards Alenko.

She picked them off to the best of her ability, launching a new singularity that carried a handful of them into the air.

"On your feet, Lieutenant," Shepard grabbed Alenko under the arms and hauled him to his feet. He nodded, the color returning to his face.

_"Shepard!"_

He turned to the sound of Liara's voice to come face to face with one of the creepers that had gotten past her singularity and her gunfire. He shoved it in the chest, barely avoiding a face full of spewed acid, but the green liquid cut right through what was left of his shields. The ablative on his arms and the thin under armor fared no better as it was chewed up by the viscous corrosive goo.

He hissed out a breath, falling back into Alenko as white-hot pain blasted behind his eyelids. He had a vague sense of his ass hitting the ground and a final shot, followed by a putrid splat as the final creeper fell to the ground. Alenko was repeating _'shit, shit, shit'_ like a cadence, pulling pieces of Shepard's sizzling suit off his arms.

Shepard's breath was loud, _so loud_ , in his ears, and his entire body felt like it was on fire. Alenko was mumbling, something about the colony and stabilizing him. Liara's feminine lilt retorted with something about a node and the mission. Alenko cursed, his deep voice close to Shepard's ear. Something cool and wet was applied to his arms and he flinched away from the sudden change in sensation; or tried to. His limbs felt heavy, and Alenko's voice was in his ear again, a low rumble telling him not to move.

_Place still smells better than Torfan_ , he thought as he slipped into unconsciousness.

~*~

Shepard felt better when he woke up. _Much_ better, in fact. _Nothing_ hurt. He had a vague sensation of itching in his arms and chest, but he honestly couldn't be bothered to care. He felt _fantastic._

He blinked up into the bright white lights of the med-bay, memories piercing through the fog in his mind. He laughed, remembering how he got where he was, which was cut off into a snort when he forgot how to breathe for a moment.

"I see you're feeling better," Dr. Chakwas said, peering down at him with an amused expression. "I do remember seeing in your file that you tend to have some disinhibition when it comes to anesthesia. Nothing worrisome."

Shepard snorted again, wiggling his bandaged fingers. "I got barfed on by a zombie thing, Doc."

She hummed, taking some notes on her omni-tool. "Yes, I know. Lieutenant Alenko had to carry you back to the colony. You gave us quite the scare. I had to put you under to repair the damage to your arms. You may have a little scarring, but it will be minimal."

"Chicks dig scars. Boys, too," he slurred. He wondered if _Kaidan_ dug scars. He bet he did. Probably had a few of his own that Eric wouldn’t mind searching for.

Dr. Chakwas shook her head, a sly smile crossing her face. "Once the anesthesia is out of your system, I'll release you to your quarters, where I'm ordering you to bed rest for a full twenty-four hours. No arguments."

Shepard scoffed, rolling his eyes. The room spun. "Ok, Mom."

The doctor sighed, closing her omni-tool interface as the door to the med-bay whooshed open. Shepard's head lolled to the side in time to see Alenko stride over to his bedside. He was dressed in his ship fatigues, the ones that fit _so well_ , specifically around his ass. Eric really wanted to pinch that ass.

"Hey, Shepard, how're you feeling?" His eyes roamed over the stark white bandages on Shepard's arms, chewing on his bottom lip. He seemed to do that a lot, especially when he was thinking about something _really_ hard. It drove Eric bonkers. He’d never wanted to be someone’s bottom lip the way he wanted to be Alenko’s. 

Shepard hummed, smirking up at him. "Hey, gorgeous."

Alenko flushed beet red, opening his mouth then shutting it instantly. Dr. Chakwas sighed.

"He'll be fine. He's having some disinhibition from the anesthesia, however."

"Oh," Alenko replied slowly, his features pinching together as he looked over Shepard's chart. He got a little wrinkle in between his eyebrows when he was thinking too hard or frustrated. Eric really wanted to kiss it off his gorgeous face.

"You my new nurse, Kaidan? Lucky me." Eric mused, winking when Kaidan's startled gaze met his. "No offense, Dr. C. He's more my type."

Kaidan sputtered, and Dr. Chakwas groaned in exasperation, patting Shepard playfully on the arm. "It's time for the lieutenant to go, and you need to get some rest, Commander."

Eric pouted, watching Kaidan's face as he tried to hide his embarrassment. The flush spread to his neck. It was delightful.

“Aw, come on, stay and talk to me. Please?”

Kaidan blinked, a vexed expression crossing his face. “Talk?”

Shepard grinned, pleased to have lured him back in. “Yep. Read me the encyclopedia for all I care. Did anyone every tell you that your voice _drips_ sex, Kaidan?”

Kaidan swallowed, and Eric let his gaze drop to his Adam’s apple, watching it bob. He wanted to nibble on it.

"I'll um, come check on you later, Shepard," Kaidan said, clearing his throat. He turned to leave, asking Dr. Chakwas to come find him if he needed anything.

Shepard tried to pout, but Kaidan was already halfway out the door, and frankly, he was feeling sleepy. "Hate to see you leave, Kaidan,” he slurred. “But I _love_ to watch you go."


	5. Old Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Alenko hummed, a small smile gracing his lips. “You’re a lot more complicated than you let people think. Like… a puzzle that gets harder to figure out each time you think you’ve got it.”_
> 
> _“You like puzzles, Kaidan?”_
> 
> _He smiled into his glass, the tops of his cheeks flushing pink. “Maybe I do.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some TWs for this chapter: Mentions of childhood sex work.  
> 
> 
> Special thanks to [ Eluvian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eluvian/profile) for tranlating Tenth Street Reds into Hungarian! ;) 
> 
> Once again big wet smooches of appreciation to [ potionsmaster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/potionsmaster) for her beta skills!

Shepard found Alenko in the mess, hunched over the dining table, his face pinched in concentration. The orange glow of an omni-tool highlighted his face; Shepard’s omni-tool. 

The damn thing had been on the fritz lately, and after listening to Williams and Garrus gripe at him about fixing it, Alenko took pity and snatched it out of his hand before Shepard could throw it against a wall. 

He was a little surprised that Alenko had offered to do it. He’d been a lot twitchier in Shepard’s presence lately, and Shepard was smart enough to realize it all stemmed back to his med-bay stay after the incident with the Thorian. He had only vague memories of what happened, like staring at it through a fog, but Williams was kind enough to fill in the gaps, laughing so hard tears gathered in the corners of her eyes. 

Ok, so Shepard had called him gorgeous, told him his voice had sounded like something out of Eric’s wet dreams, and ogled his ass. Eric Shepard was a lot of things. A liar wasn’t one of them. Shepard didn’t see the big deal, but apparently Alenko did, and spent the next several days either avoiding him completely or giving him a deer in headlights look whenever they passed in the hall. 

Whatever had freaked him out didn’t seem to be bothering him anymore, however, as he offered Shepard a small smile when he approached the dining table. 

“You didn’t have to do this, you know,” Shepard said by way of greeting, slipping onto the bench across from him. “I could have given it to Tali.” 

Alenko raised one eyebrow suspiciously. “Yeah, but _would_ you have?” 

Eric grunted, frowning at the orange interface above Alenko’s arm. 

Alenko shrugged, going back to fiddling with the interfaces of Shepard’s omni-tool. “It’s fine. I’m almost done. You had a lot of bugs and viruses on this thing. I installed a spam blocker, so that should take care of a lot of the excess messages. Um, you _do_ know the more of those things you open, the more you get, right?” 

Shepard just blinked at him, and Alenko pulled his bottom lip behind his teeth to stop from laughing. 

“Right. Well, uh, just know that the displaced asari matriarch looking to hide her massive fortune in your account isn’t actually a real thing.” 

Shepard stared at him, grinding his teeth. Alenko smirked, a snort escaping his mouth as he tried not to laugh. He closed the interface and slid the omni-tool across the table to Shepard. 

“All set,” Alenko said, and Shepard began to fasten it back to his wrist. “Oh, you received a message marked urgent a few minutes ago. I didn’t read it, but it popped up while I was working. From someone named Javier?” 

Eric’s eyes darted back up to Alenko’s face, a pit settling in his stomach. Alenko’s features softened, brows knitting together in concern. 

“Everything ok, Commander?” 

Shepard nodded absently, pulling up his message interface. One message remained unopened, flagged ‘urgent’. The familiar name of the sender tightened Eric’s chest. How long had it been? Ten years now? 

_Eric – I’m sorry to reach out to you this way, after so long, but I’m running out of options. I need your help, and rumor has it you have some pull now. I can’t say much and believe me I know how cliché that sounds. I can practically hear you laughing at me as I type this. I’m staying on the Citadel, at least for a while longer. If you could help out an old friend, I’d owe you. Again._

_I hope you’re doing well. It’s been too long. Hopefully we have a chance to catch up if you make your way over here._

_Yours,_

_Javi_

Shepard closed the omni-took interface, looking up to meet Alenko’s concerned gaze. 

“Sir?” 

“Yeah,” Shepard said, sliding out of his seat. “Thanks for the tech assist, LT.” 

He made a beeline for the CIC to make a bit of a course correction, leaving Alenko and his confused expression behind him. 

~*~ 

The Normandy docked at the Citadel the next day, and Shepard gave the crew the rest of the day off while the ship underwent refueling the maintenance. It was ahead of schedule by a full month, but other than a squinty look he received from Pressly, the crew appreciated the unexpected gift, unloading off the ship in civvies and smiles. 

Shepard check his omni-tool. He’d sent a short message back to Javier after he’d re-routed the Normandy’s course: _I dock on the Citadel tomorrow. Meet me at Chora’s Den. 1300._

He’d received a short reply: _See you then._

Shepard was halfway to the tram before he realized he wasn’t alone. 

“Alenko, what are you doing?” He said, not bothering to look up at the man as he inputted his destination into the interface. 

“Backing you up.” Alenko explained. 

Shepard sighed. “You’re on leave. Scram.” 

Alenko shook his head, petulant determination in the tightness of his jaw. “Something spooked you about that message you received. You looked like you saw a ghost. I’ve seen you glare down the barrel of a shotgun and not blink, but a message on your omni-tool phased you.” He nodded towards Shepard’s hip, where his side-arm was strapped. “And you’re the only one to leave the ship armed.” 

Shepard frowned. “I’m a Spectre. I should be armed on the Citadel at all times.” 

Alenko crossed his arms over his chest. He wasn’t buying it. 

Shepard groaned. “I have some personal business to attend to and I really don’t need an audience.” 

Alenko regarded his suspiciously. “Ok. Still doesn’t explain why you need a gun.” 

Shepard ground his teeth, staring the man down. He was usually fairly good and glaring things – and people – into submission, but he realized quickly that wasn’t going to work with Alenko. For some reason, the stubborn asshole was bound and determined to stick this one out. 

“You’re just going to follow me if I leave you here, aren’t you?” 

“Yep.” 

“And if I manage to lose you, you’ll just hack into my omni-tool and find my location, won’t you?” 

“Yep.” 

The tram arrived and Shepard threw the door open with more force than was strictly necessary. “If you want to spend your night of R&R following me around, then by all means.” He ushered Alenko into the tram with a dramatic flourish. 

Instead of the eye-roll he was expecting, Alenko flashed him a shit eating grin. Shepard snorted as he climbed in behind him, trying to hide the small smile on his face. 

~*~ 

Alenko’s bravado faded a bit once he realized they were heading to Chora’s Den. He cleared his throat, and when Shepard turned around, he looked… uncomfortable. It was a testament to Shepard’s current mental state that he wasn’t in the mood to tease him about it. 

Besides, places like Chora’s Den made him itch deep under his skin, somewhere he could never reach. 

“Relax, Alenko. I’m not here for the entertainment.” 

Even in the middle of the day, Chora’s Den was packed. Eric sighed, scanning the room for a familiar face as they made their way inside. The music was loud, a deep thump that you felt as much as heard, and the smells were all too familiar: cheap perfume and cologne, sweat, and a little bit of desperation. Eric ignored the way it made his stomach churn. 

“Eric Shepard, all grown up.” 

He spun towards the sound of his name. A man sat at one of the round tables, a smug smile on his face. Eric scowled. He didn’t recognize him right away, but there was something familiar about him. 

“You don’t recognize me? Too fancy for us lowly street rats anymore?” 

Shepard grunted, taking one of the empty seats and motioning for Alenko to do the same. The face wasn’t familiar, but he recognized that cocky voice anywhere. 

“Finch. Been a long time. I’m going to go out of a limb and say you being here isn’t a coincidence.” 

Finch hummed, reclining back in his seat and crossing an ankle over the opposite knee. “Look at you, putting two and two together. The straight and narrow’s really done wonders for you, hasn’t it?” 

Alenko bristled beside him, shifting in his seat. It was subtle enough that Finch didn’t notice, and his body language shifted back to normal a moment later. 

“I see you’re as charming as ever,” Shepard pointed out. “Where’s Javier?” 

Finch smirked, one corner of his mouth pulling against a scar on his cheek that hadn’t been there the last time Eric had seen him nearly ten years prior. “Oh, Javi? He’s dead.” 

Shepard glared at him. He kept the mask neutral; he’d always been good at that, but he felt suddenly a little short of breath. Living the life they had, it was never out of the realm of possibility that one of them would wind up dead at any point. Hell, making it to thirty was something to celebrate. 

He leaned forward in his seat, catching Finch’s eyes and holding them. _Never let them see you squirm._

“Cut the crap. What do you want? Did Javi even _send_ me that message?” 

“Oh, he sent it alright.” Finch explained. A slight twitch in his leg was the only indication that Eric’s steady glare affected him at all. Finch had never been particularly afraid of Eric – not that Eric had given him any reason _to_ be afraid of him – but they hadn’t seen each other in a decade. Lots had changed. “We found him dead five hours later. I’ve got no idea what he wanted from you, but it worked out well for me because _I_ could use your help, too. One of our guys got himself into a bit of trouble, and I was hoping you’d use that shiny new Spectre status to help out an old friend.” 

Shepard flopped back in his seat, rolling his eyes. “I’m not doing shit for you.” 

Finch bristled, scarred face pulling into an ugly scowl. “What, you get off the streets and join the good guys are think you’re better than us now? Is that it?” 

Eric smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. “I _am_ better than you.” 

Finch’s face contorted in anger, and he opened his mouth to reply before Eric cut him off. 

“What are you doing these days, Finch? Still peddling red sand?” 

Finch stood up like a shot, face flushed red with rage. Shepard and Alenko stood with him, out of instinct more than anything, Shepard’s hand going to his side-arm and Alenko’s fidgeting where his normally would be. 

“Fuck you, Shepard. Only reason you got out was because that fancy fucking commander took a shine to you.” He features shifted to smug satisfaction, glancing over at Alenko briefly before locking eyes with Eric again. “Anderson, wasn’t it? Did he know what you did for us? How good you were at it? How many times did you have to suck his dick before he gave you a brand-new life?” 

The hairs on Eric’s arm stood on end as a static buzz washed across his skin. He was vaguely aware of a bright blue glow out of the corner of his eye a moment before Finch was off his feet, slammed in the chest by a concentrated biotic blast. He hit the back wall a few feet behind them with a thud, crumpling to the ground. Shepard stared owlishly at Alenko, who looked madder than he’d ever seen him. And was still glowing blue. 

He glared at Finch, who was climbing to his feet and finding his bearings. Shepard put a hand on Alenko’s arm, getting a static shock for his efforts, and pulled back with a hiss. But it was enough to get his attention, and Alenko’s gaze shifted to him, softening just a little. Eric nodded for them to go, and actually got his back to Finch before the idiot opened his mouth again. 

“You owe us, Eric,” he spat. “You would have died on the streets if it wasn’t for us.” 

Shepard pushed his features back to neutral, leveling Finch with a stare. “I don’t owe you shit. Get off the Citadel. I see you here again and you’ll find out why they made the Butcher of Torfan the first human Spectre.” 

He hoofed it out of the bar, leaving Finch sputtering and irritated behind him. Alenko kept pace next to him, and Shepard could practically feel his eyes on him. 

Shepard huffed. “Go ahead and say whatever it is you want to say, Alenko.” 

Alenko pursed his lips, brows pinching together. “I’m sorry about your friend.” 

Eric nodded at length, his stomach protesting the mention of it. 

Alenko pointed back towards Chora’s Den with a thumb. “You don’t want to find out what happened to him?” 

“I doubt he knows. He wouldn’t tell me anyway.” 

Alenko frowned, worrying his bottom lip. 

“That was quite the light show back there.” Shepard offered, throwing him a sideways glance. 

Alenko appeared abashed. “Sorry, Commander. I don’t usually lose control like that. My abilities are sometimes affected by strong emotion and, um...” He cleared his throat, flushing red. “Anyway, I apologize. Won’t happen again.” 

Shepard snorted, opening the door of the tram when it arrived, ushering Alenko inside. “You say ‘lose control’, I say ‘concentrated badass’.” 

Alenko grinned, settling back into his seat. “Where are we going now?” 

“Flux. I need a drink. And since I got the pleasure of watching you knock Finch on his ass, first round is on me.” 

Alenko nodded, brows pinched together in a way that Shepard was quickly learning meant he was thinking about something. 

“Spit it out, Alenko.” One of these days he wouldn’t have to pry it out of him. 

He looked up at Shepard, blinked once. “Those things he said about you. How you grew up. I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” 

“Sorry for what? That I had to suck dick to get enough money to eat?” 

Alenko winced, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. “ _Jesus_ , Shepard…” 

Shepard shrugged. “I’m not ashamed of it, Alenko. I did a lot of things I didn’t want to in order to survive. It is what it is.” 

Alenko frowned, staring at the floor under his boots. “You were a _child._ ” 

“I was.” Shepard agreed. “A kid that would have starved to death or found themselves in a worse situation if I didn’t learn to take care of myself. So, I did. I can’t change it. I don’t regret it, because I’m still alive and kicking, so no point in being ashamed.” 

Alenko nodded, satisfied for now at least, although there was a tightness around his eyes that Shepard would have preferred not to be there. The very last thing he wanted was for anyone to pity him. 

They arrived at Flux and found a table in the back, facing the entrance. The waitress promptly trotted over to ask them what they wanted. Alenko asked for whisky neat, and Shepard told her to surprise him with something extra sweet. She giggled as she walked away. 

“So,” Alenko started, plucking a random straw off the table and fiddling with it. “Finch mentioned you owed ‘us’. Who was ‘us’?” 

Shepard studied him. It was a direct question from his normally soft-spoken Lieutenant, but the day had been full of surprises so far. 

“Tizedik Utcai Vörösök,” Shepard replied, and at Alenko’s confused expression, clarified. “The Tenth Street Reds. A street gang based out of Budapest. They were the ones I ran with as a kid.” 

Shepard shot him a wry look. “It’s all public knowledge, and it’s pretty popular on the extra-net at the moment.” 

Alenko shrugged. “Didn’t read it.” 

“I’m surprised. There’s some real juicy tidbits in there.” 

“Files don’t tell the whole story,” Alenko replied, a small frown on his face. 

Shepard supposed he knew that better than anyone. 

“And Javier,” Alenko continued. “He was a friend of yours?” 

Shepard nodded. “Closest thing to a friend as you can get in the Reds. Growing up in the streets, you learn not to trust people pretty quickly. But, going it alone is also a good way to end up gutted in an alley.” He shrugged. “Javi and I had each other’s backs. Bunked together as often as we could, watched out for each other during jobs. That sort of thing. We both got really good at sewing each other up.” 

Alenko met his eyes, brows pinched together and the corners of his lips pulled down. “Was he more than a friend?” 

Eric blinked, slightly taken back. He had been reasonably sure he hadn’t given anything away. Where had he gone wrong? 

“I’m sorry, that was invasive.” Alenko sputtered, shaking his head. 

“We were lovers, yeah.” Eric continued before he could think better of it. He wasn’t even sure why he’d said it. “Never labeled it, never made it exclusive.” 

“I’m sorry, Shepard.” 

_Me too_ , Eric thought, but didn’t say it out loud. He just nodded, instead. Truth was, of the people his age that he grew up with in the Reds, he, Javier, and Finch were the only ones left alive. Well, just Eric and Finch now. None of them hard particularly long life spans. It was just a shame Finch outlasted Javi. 

“Is that why you joined the Alliance?” Alenko asked at length, thanking the waitress and palming his glass as she sat their drinks on the table. She offered Eric a shy smile and a side-ways glance as she passed by. “To escape the Reds?” 

Eric took a sip of the red and yellow concoction the waitress had brought him, complete with enough fruit to grow a tree. He made a face at the orange slice, tossing it on the table, but pulled one of the cherries off the stem with his teeth. He passed another one to Alenko, who accepted it with a grin. 

“Yeah, essentially. The Alliance offered stability. Three meals a day, a bed to sleep in. Most of the time, anyway.” 

Alenko hummed, snatching the abandoned orange slice off the table. “Maybe. But if all you were looking for was stability, you wouldn’t have put yourself through seven levels of ICT.” 

He ate the flesh of the fruit, tossing the rind back on the table. Eric smirked at him, impressed. Alenko was astute. He never pretended to be dumber than he was, but he tended to fly under the radar because of how quiet he was. Shepard imagined he picked up on a lot of things because no one really thought to hide around him. 

“One of the ways the Reds made extra money was to hire out its members for special services,” Eric explained, swirling ice around in his glass. “Muscle for hire, bodyguards, thugs, things like that. I was the entertainment, a pretty face with a certain set of skills. I was good at what I did and gained the Reds favor with a lot of powerful people. But… some of my clients used their advantage over me against me.” He waved a hand. “Psychoanalyze it all you want… probably going to ICT was my way of proving I could kill someone as easy as seduce them.” 

Alenko looked slightly uncomfortable, frowning at his glass as if it offended him somehow. After a moment, he looked up at Shepard with enough compassion in his eyes that Eric’s stomach rolled. 

“I don’t want pity, Kaidan.” 

He cocked his head slightly, pursing his lips. “I don’t pity you, Shepard. Shit, I admire the hell out of you. Most people in your situation wouldn’t have the guts to pull themselves out of the gutter and do better. What you’ve managed to accomplish despite that is nothing short of impressive.” 

Eric snorted into his glass. “Guess you and I have that in common.” 

Alenko hummed, a small smile gracing his lips. “You’re a lot more complicated than you let people think. Like… a puzzle that gets harder to figure out each time you think you’ve got it.” 

“You like puzzles, Kaidan?” 

He smiled into his glass, the tops of his cheeks flushing pink. “Maybe I do.” 

Eric sipped his sugary drink, studying Kaidan a little unabashedly. The dim lights of the bar highlighted masculine features: the strength of his jaw, the fullness of his lips. He really was a gorgeous human being; not that Eric hadn’t noticed that from the get-go. But appreciation of the physical aside, there was _something_ that added to it. Maybe it was the steadfast moral compass, or the compassion he kept despite the massive piles of shit they’d all seen, or even that underneath that calm and cool exterior there was a raging inferno of power just waiting to be unleashed. 

This was usually the point where Eric would drag him off into the first dark corner he could find and show him just how much he appreciated all the beauty. But something stopped him. Maybe he was just really into his drink. Maybe it was the threat of fraternization regulations, though he’d never gave a fuck about those before. Or maybe it was Kaidan’s omni-tool beeping with a message that Williams wanted to join them. Either way, Eric stayed rooted where he was, taking a couple extra moments to shamelessly ogle while Kaidan replied to Williams’ message. 

“Tell her to get her ass over here. I’m feeling generous.” 

Williams arrived fifteen minutes later, settling into the seat next to Kaidan peering at Shepard’s rainbow-colored drink suspiciously. 

"What," he bit out. 

"Nothing, sir, just uh… not the type of drink I expected you to enjoy." 

Shepard shrugged, plucking another cherry off its stem with his teeth. “I have a sweet tooth." 

Alenko snorted into his whisky. Williams smiled. He just rolled his eyes at them. The swill he had grown up on could hardly be considered a drink and was used for the sole purpose of getting drunk. It'd done that job well, but now that he was older and had actual disposable income, he preferred something that tasted good. Whatever colorful Asari drink the bartender recommended was no _Palinka_ , that was for sure, but it would do. 

They chatted mindlessly for a while; about the last mission, the quality (or lack thereof) of the food on the Normandy, what they planned to do with the rest of their leave. Williams planned to catch up on her vid calls to her sisters and her sleep, as well as do a little shopping. Alenko mentioned catching up with some friends from basic training that were stationed on the Citadel. 

Shepard made a face as they chatted. He'd probably get a hotel room, something rated a couple stars, but not too many, take a long fucking nap, and maybe find some company for the remainder of shore leave. He said as much out loud and was met with a sly smile from Williams. 

"Need a wingman, Skipper?" Williams quipped, rolling the base of her beer bottle in circles on the table. "We could probably head down to Chora's Den-" 

Shepard shook his head vehemently. "I don't pay for sex, Williams." 

She hadn’t been there for the confrontation with Finch earlier, hadn’t been part of his conversation with Kaidan later on. She had no way of knowing where his mind was on the topic, but she was quick to wipe the suspicious look off her face. Alenko peered into his glass, trying to hide the understanding and compassion on his face. 

"Alright," Williams continued, gazing around the room. "What are you into, then? Busty? Petite? Redhead?" 

Shepard's eyes darted from her to Alenko. He was looking decidedly uncomfortable with the whole situation, if the way he was concentrating on swirling the straw in his glass was any indication. Williams gave Eric a smug smile, her sharp gaze flickering from Shepard to Alenko, then back again. 

Ah. He saw how it was. 

Shepard made a non-committal hum. "Not bad. Probably wouldn't say no to any of those options, anyway." 

Williams sat up straighter, pushing her now empty beer to the center of the table. "Ok, what's your weakness then? What really gets your motor running?" 

Shepard smirked. She was sly; he liked that about her. "Tall, dark, and handsome," he offered, and Alenko made a choking noise. 

Williams hummed, nodding her head. "Good choice, Skipper. You seem like a guy that likes the athletic types; someone that takes care of himself." 

Eric took a long swig of his drink, gaze lingering on his flustered Lieutenant, who was making it a point to not look at either of them. "Oh yeah. Nothing like a good set of muscles you can run your hands all over." Alenko coughed. "Although, I don't like cocky guys. I've got enough ego for the both of us. The quiet, unassuming types are what really trip my trigger." 

Alenko was as red as a sunset. Eric was delighted. 

"Besides, you know what they say about the quiet ones." 

Kaidan shot out of his chair so fast it almost fell over. "I'm going to get us another round," he said, words pouring out so quickly they barely made sense, then high tailed it to the bar. 

Shepard watched him go, pursing his lips. 

"Spill," Williams ordered. 

Eric dragged his gaze away from his lieutenant, and his incredible ass, to look at her. Her eyebrows raised to her hairline and seriously, Williams eyebrow game almost rivaled Alenko's. 

"Spill what, Chief?" 

She scoffed. "Come on, Skipper, it doesn't take a genius to see the way you've been staring at Kaidan for weeks now." 

Eric glared at her. "So? I like to look. No harm in that." 

"Looking, _sure_. Ok, sir." 

Shepard scoffed, sitting back in his seat. “I like to flirt. I flirt with everybody.” 

“Bullshit.” 

Shepard’s eyebrows shot to this hairline. 

Williams rolled her eyes. “You flirt with the waitress or the bartender or an occasional civilian, but not often in Kaidan’s presence and you’ve never flirted with anyone on the ship. Except him.” 

Shepard scoffed, pinning her with a glare. After a moment, he continued, "I mean, I can't even tell what he's into. I'm usually pretty good at getting a read on that sort of thing, but-" 

"Sixty-forty split in favor of women," she offered. 

Shepard started at her as if she'd just grown another head. She shrugged. 

"What? We're friends. We talk." 

She sighed then, leaning across the table and folding her hands in front of her. "Permission to speak freely, sir?" 

Eric gave her a wry look. "Go on, Williams." 

"If you hurt him, I'll break your jaw." 

Shepard blinked at her, then bust out laughing. What else was he supposed to do in this situation? "Duly noted, Williams." 

"I'm serious, Shepard." She said, and the look on her face said it was true. "I haven't made a lot of friends in my military career. My family name has taken care of that. But Kaidan doesn't give a shit about that. He's the best friend I've had in a long time, and he's one of the best people I've ever met." 

She paused, giving him a wry look. "I can tell you're into him. Anyone with eyes could see that. But Kaidan, he…" She paused, sighing. "He doesn't do the casual stuff. He gets attached. Just keep that in mind." 

She sat back then, and Shepard just stared at her owlishly, belatedly realizing that Alenko was returning with the next round of drinks. 

He grinned, placing a glass filled with a familiar liquid in front of Shepard and handing a fancy looking lager to Williams, keeping a second for himself. 

Eric took a sip of the drink. _Palinka_. Plum. He gave Alenko a suspicious look, and the blush was back. 

"We drank it after the mission on Luna, remember?" he said, shrugging, and Shepard noticed William’s warm smile aimed at the Lieutenant. "So, I asked at the bar and they just happened to have it," 

"Thanks, Lieutenant," Eric offered, eyeing him warily. 

He’d flirted with Kaidan. Kaidan had sort of flirted back, if turning various shades of red was considered flirting. But the shy smile he offered up as he slipped back into his seat was something different. Something that made Eric’s fingertips tingle and his stomach drop. 

_“You know how it is, Eric,” Javi had said once, years ago. “People like us, we lose the things we get attached to. It’s better for everyone to just…not.”_

Shepard caught someone staring at him out of the corner of his eye. He turned his head and made eye contact with their red-headed waitress, who was shouldering up a handbag and preparing to leave. She smiled at him, nodding in the direction of the exit. 

_“What we’re doing here,” Javi had said, gesturing between the two of them as they lay spread out on Eric’s bed, sharing a cigarette and bottle of rot-gut bourbon. “We both know how it’s going to end. Better not to name it.”_

_“Never said I_ wanted _to name it, Javi.” Eric had replied, taking a drag of the cigarette and passing it back._

Shepard abandoned his drink and stood, tossing a couple credit chits on the table. “You two enjoy your night. I’ll see you back on the ship.” He turned to go, catching a glimpse of the looks tossed his way, Williams’ incendiary glare and Alenko’s puppy dog eyes. He could feel their eyes on his back as he joined the red head at the exit. She winked at him, running her fingertips down his arm. 

This was better. This was safe. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! If you'd like to learn more about Eric, please visit me on [Tumblr](http://mallaidhsomo.tumblr.com). There's some amazeballs fan art of him I've had commissioned over there. 
> 
> Oenomel also has a [Spotify playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/34Sc6yhwm85KvRafC3eaHT?si=A_vfevZSR-yDmGEOev8Pvg) ;)


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